Some things should never be public...

This has to do with FaceBook, as a lot of my inspiration for writing comes from. If it offends anyone, I'm sorry but it's true!
I'm sure we are all somewhat guilty of this, as I know I am for sure. With things like Face Book and Myspace it's really easy to put almost every detail of your life out for everyone to read. For instance, even in mood status, and if someone says they are in a bad mood, the chances of someone asking 'Why?' are quite high. Which means that the probability of that person venting into the exact reason they are in bad mood, is even higher. Leaving it out for not just the person that inquired but all of your "friends" and all of their friends, and if your privacy settings are really liberal, anyone that looks you up!
Without these tools of the internet who would know about your bad mood? Close friends, maybe one or two, and a parent or something like that? So why would we want to share stuff that we would normally reserve for very close friends and family with the entire web population?
Recently, I went on a date...lots of people know this, and quite a few know some details. I really tried not to put too much on my facebook because someone else is going to read this, and it could get back to the other person, and it would be hurtful to them. Possibly anyway. I have shared even more than I needed in my divorce. Granted, at least, right now, my kids can't read it. And sometimes writing on face book helps me not to have a telephone conversation while my kids are in the room. I really try hard to shelter them from my annoyances with their father. But really should the whole town, and more, know about my divorce and what my ex husband is doing?? No. They shouldn't. Should I be projecting every little thing he does that annoys or hurts me to all of my friends, 320 of them? No. I shouldn't. I am ashamed I have done this. I complained, mostly on Myspace, about my most recent ex. This I must admit was more to get his attention than anything. But it's definitely not the right way to deal with a relationship.
I was reading my live news feeds and saw that someone is having relationship problems, I know that the other part of the relationship reads the same thing, if not more, than I do. I've seen her replies to his posts in the past. So anyway, and I'm sorry if you are the one I'm talking about and reading this, I'm really not trying to offend, but it's advice whether it's wanted or not. ANYWAY - this person was complaining that issues within the relationship are being discussed with friends of the other person - who are of the opposite sex, and not dealt with inside the relationship. However, is going to a friend (guy or girl) really any different then posting that you are having problems about problems on Facebook? Still doesn't seem right. Bashing that person and they way they are in the relationship cannot be healthy nor helpful.
Even in person, if I'm having a problem with my partner - which I don't have at the moment! (This is a good thing!) - and I call up my bestie and bitch and moan and complain and run that person down, how are they supposed to help me? That is not helpful, that is not solving anything. If you are at that point that all you can do is judge and pick apart the other persons actions and words, then well you don't really want to fix things. By what you are saying all you are asking for is someone to agree with you, which will inflame you more, and make any attempts in the future to mend things that much harder.
And furthermore, I have complained about boyfriends and my ex husband to even just my friends and my mom, and then worked things out. But when you do your best to convince someone that this person is doing you wrong in some way, it puts a sour taste in their mouth about that person. So then you are stuck trying to defend the person you are with, and the reasons you are still with them to someone you just spent a great deal of energy trying to convince that this person was so horrible, or inconsiderate, or dumb, or cheating, or whatever...
I, personally, trust very few people to listen to me really complain about someone, someone that can tell me to settle down, look at the overall picture, if I'm not happy, how can I fix it? That is what friends are...and I do not count all of my 320 friends close enough relationships to ask everyone's advice. The majority of the people who will read my comment, completely out of context will take my side and tell me I'm right. Do I like to hear that? Yes, is it going to help me solve anything? No. Sometimes I do ask for advice and I expect to have all spectrums of solutions...but that's a different subject.
I see MANY people exploit their spouses or friends or feelings in general. And I see many that never bring that element into their facebook page. There is a huge difference in their "drama" levels.
Now keep in mind, I fully admit to seeing my guilt in this, and with this blog, I vow to change that! I vow to keep my mouth shut in general a little bit more. We all know I talk too much, it's something I've done since apparently I learned how to talk. Sometimes I think I run out of "normal" things to talk about so I throw in whatever else I can think of, giving up WAY too many details or information than that person should be privileged to have.
I guess my point is, if you value your real friends, use them appropriately. My real friends get my deepest, darkest, craziest secrets. Those are the ones that matter, they really care. The others, they don't need to know all the juicy details to my life! If you value someone and value your relationship, work on it together, not with all your facebook friends that really don't know enough to help, and aren't close enough to give you the sound genuine advice or support that you need.
Most of all, if you wouldn't want to read it about yourself, maybe you should think twice about writing it about someone else...